Let’s face it: ending a marriage is never easy. But if divorce occurs after 20 to 25 years or more, the aftermath can be especially severe, especially where your finances are concerned.
For starters, get a good lawyer. While this may be an obvious point, Fox Business.com recommends that you not “waste cash venting to your attorney.” Stick to the facts of the case and “think with your wallet, not your heart.” If you have differences with your soon-to-be ex, “look for alternative ways to resolve their differences such as mediation, to negotiate the division of your assets” and let your lawyer fight or what legally belongs to you.
The next thing to do is create a realistic budget for yourself as a single person before the divorce becomes final. The one challenge many recent divorced individuals face is learning how to effectively manage their finances. If you will be receiving a settlement, you’ll need to do some careful planning as well, particularly if you receive cash. You may find it helpful to seek the assistance of a financial adviser.
If you and your spouse owed money as a couple, you’ll also need to prepare for merged debt. Some of the repayment responsibility will fall to you even if you didn’t make the purchases. It’s possible, though, that the court will award you a greater share of you and your former spouse’s total assets. In the case of secured debts, however, “the debt follows the asset—you get the house you get the mortgage.”
Where real estate is concerned, should you be the one to keep the family home, be sure that you can “afford the mortgage and other property costs.” It would also be smart to “get an appraisal and conduct a title search right away.” Your spouse could have used the house as collateral on a loan. The last thing you need is a piece of property that has a lien on it—especially one you didn’t know anything about.
Some people who go through a divorce shut down emotionally and isolate themselves from others. This behavior is unwise: if you have adult children or other relatives who are close to you and can offer you emotional and/or economic support, you may want to consider accepting their assistance. Besides which it is far better to “talk about the challenges you have, what you would like to change, what’s working and ways to improve” than live in denial.
Walking away from a multi-decade marriage commitment takes courage and a willingness to embrace radical change. With the right legal and professional assistance, you can restart your life on the secure footing you’ll need to succeed on your own.